On Friday, the moon, at zero degrees of Gemini, made its monthly opposition with the sun, at zero degrees of Sagittarius. The sun and the moon are in square with Mars in Pisces. The sun is in conjunction with Jupiter in Sagittarius and Mercury, ruler of Gemini, is retrograde in Sagittarius. This astrological configuration is called a T-square, (in this case) in the mutable signs.
One way of integrating or working with the energetic tension of a T-square is to direct our attention to the fourth of the signs that completes the cross, in this case Virgo. Virgo always calls us to honor the details, to cultivate consciousness in our daily acts. In this sea of energies in movement Virgo is the anchor.
Small changes make big differences. Habits, routines, practices, diet, order, cleaning. There, at the small scale, we will see the magic of the immensity align itself with our will, focus and intention. Over these coming days, so as not to lose ourselves, in order to avoid getting distracted, the key is to honor each task and dedicate ourselves to what we do.
The sun projects its light on the face of the moon which in turn illuminates our nights. Between the new moon in Scorpio on the 7th November and the Friday’s full moon, as the moon has been growing, something has been slowly illuminated and clarified within us, in our surroundings. The full moon, reveals, lights up, illuminates.
Over the last two weeks there have been enough planetary changes to make us feel as if we were once again in a foreign land, or even crossing distant oceans. There is a part of us that feels dislocated, lost in the epic and mutable experience of reality.
Only two weeks ago we were honoring the portal of the new moon in Scorpio, with Venus retrograde in Libra, Jupiter on the last degree of Scorpio, Mars on the last degree of Aquarius and the nodes of the moon completing their 18 month transit through the Leo-Aquarius axis. Now, Venus is direct, Jupiter is in Sagittarius, Mercury is retrograde, Mars (after 7 months in Aquarius) has entered into Pisces and the nodes of the moon have begun transiting through the Cancer-Capricorn axis.
Finding clarity and the internal stability in this moving sea is a challenge. Even more so when Mercury – ruler of Gemini and of this full moon – has already started on its retrograde journey back through Sagittarius. It can be exhausting to enter into the energetic field of yet another planet travelling retrograde after a year in which the constant theme has been to go backwards. It can be exhausting to feel how the unresolved past can have such power over our life. It can be exhausting to resist continuing to dive into places that ask us for rescue, liberation, truth.
We need air. We need light. We need a breath of inspiration that nourishes our fresh, renewed, creative vision.
At times we breathe deeply. We feel rested. Our vision opens, we can come up to the surface, a renewed confidence lifts us up: we are present. And, yet once again, the wave returns and calls us to retreat, to descend, to go back, to rest, to pause. There is no truce. A sea of emotions presents itself and we go back to going around in circles, in the spiral, in this centrifuge of somatic intensities, of repressed ancestral feelings, of voices which emerge from the depths of our soul.
And if the wave does not call us from inside, then external challenges and limits – that take the form of conflicts and difficulties – trigger these feelings of exhaustion, dissolution, insecurity and unease.
Some may lose hope that this movement has any sense at all, that it belongs to any form of order. We want a solution, now, immediately. Please stop, we plead. Until when? we ask. We want to feel the edge, the limit of this reality. We want something to contain us, protect us. We want to stop feeling the abyss that envelops us and reveals itself in all its immensity. We want to step onto safe and solid ground. And yet the firmness of the earth dissolves under our feet. We ask ourselves: what is happening to our reality? Where is our vision?
And in response to these questions we invoke our gods and goddesses, our medicines, our skills, in order to overcome the spell that attacks the empire of our certainties. And we realize that our resources, our ceremonies, our therapies, our supports, our laws and our beliefs do not sustain us as they once did.
And so, what do we do to stop this narrative which challenges our identity, our feeling of belonging? Can we control this that which infringes upon our version of reality? Is it about controlling it? Are we clinging to old forms? Do we harden up? Do we switch off, shut off our vision? Do we go back to our bubble? Do we cling to dogmas, norms, rules for supporting our self? Are we open to change? Do we have curiosity? Are we in awe? Are we open to the unexpected?
Perhaps this feeling of dizziness that the sequence of retrograde planets throughout this year has provoked has the function of shaking up our version of reality. Our foundations are shaking. Our histories no longer sustain us, or we no longer know how to sustain our histories. Our stories – our version of how to describe what we are, what we have done, what we want to do and what surrounds us – may now seem like they are made of cardboard, like they have lost their seductive shine. It is as if we were on the same stages as ever, but without the vibrational charm which enthused us or with which we fell in love in the past. A creative void submerges us in the repetition of the familiar and the flavor that nourished us has lost its strength and beauty.
If this is the climate we are navigating through at the moment, if we feel trapped in a loop – a spiral from which we cannot find the exit – the key is the sun in conjunction with Jupiter in Sagittarius. Its light, reflected by the moon, illuminates our emotional body. This combination offers us the power of the creative question. The question is the arrow of light that rescues us from the craziness of our binary, comparative mind and which launches us to open up our vision to a more expanded, wide, cosmic and universal dimension of reality.
Investigate the symptom, give voice to what hurts, without judgement, without censorship: simply by asking, who are you? where do you come from? what message do you have for me?
Sometimes – often – the question is a sufficient trigger for resistance to soften, to break the spell of comparison, so that the truths that converge within us find their courses, voices and words in order to come out into the light.
The creative question is that which – with the love of good humor – rather than condemning what we feel – or what challenges us and traps us – instead simply asks. We can make infinite lists of questions. But just one question, without an answer – as yet – triggers a process that makes us receptive. Opens us up to receive, gets us out of complaint, out of the contraction of fear. With the question we honor the virtue of curiosity, the openness of allowing ourselves to be surprised, the beauty of feeling in awe of the unknown. The question opens the magic of the spirit, shakes us out of our passivity, calls us to be present, gives voices to movement. Before answers emerge, good questions are necessary.
And if the art of questioning our symptoms calls to the silenced voices within us to tell us their stories, how might it look to open up a path of intimacy towards others through questions? Is the question not perhaps the bridge, the link, the weave that connects us? Is the question not perhaps the door to intimacy?
How are you? How do you feel? Is this a good time to talk? Am I interrupting you? When is good for you? Do you feel like it? How do you see it? Can I count on you? Shall we collaborate?
Below this full moon of energetic mutation, the potential for a renewed optimism emerges. Hope springs forth when we realize how liberating it is to accept our emotional movements without judging them, without trying to control them, without fear of submerging ourselves into where we are called to go. Receiving the voices of the different symptoms which emerge, accepting the discomfort of the invitation to go through the doorway – to soften rigidity, to recover the energy that had been kidnapped by the past – becomes a practice which strengthens a subtle, previously unknown muscle.
The movements that have stirred up our emotional body have undone the knots of old traumas. A hard, rancid, fossilized nucleus has softened, is softening. The fortitude that we have acquired by being present in the midst of the intensity of the emotional energy has strengthened our temperance, our will to mature and our spiritual resilience. In the middle of the energetic centrifuge our heart is present.
We have accepted the dismantling of the lies and at the same time have found other means of expression with which to give voice to our truth. This process has allowed us to experience an updated version of our being. Our verse – our words – are becoming more consonant and authentic with who we are today, not with who we were yesterday.
Some have unmasked a lie whose roots predate our birth. We have seen through the deception of familiar and collective narratives in which we believed and in which – whether through naivety, ignorance, pain, fear, solitude, adaption or need for belonging – we agree to involve ourselves, sacrifice ourselves.
We give our heart to ideological networks, to social projects, to ceremonial bodies, to collectives and circles which now no longer sustain our version of being. Places in which our verse is not accepted, collected, welcomed, valued, validated. Places in which the perverse (that which is outside of verse) has been revealed to be toxic, dominant.
The perverse being lies. The perverse being the gap between words and actions. The perverse being that which corrodes reciprocal, egalitarian, respectful relationships. The perverse being the use and abuse of the energy of ourselves and of others. The perverse being repression, censorship.
And now with Mars out of the territory of Aquarius (where it went retrograde in July) we start a process of energetic digestion of this long transit. The deprogramming of an old mental authority now reveals its corporal and somatic dimensions.
Mars in Pisces takes the experience of mental deprogramming from Aquarius to the field of the soul. Now we have to digest the emotional and spiritual implications of the fall of the empire that has been dismantled in our mind.
For this reason, perhaps we feel disoriented. Perhaps this is why we are not fully connected. Perhaps this is why we need care, pause, rest, repose so that our body – avatar of our consciousness and totality – takes in the information that has been revealed during the course of this year.
Aquarius is an air sign, a fixed sign. Mars has gone from the quietude, rigidity and coldness of Aquarius to the emotional intensity of Pisces. Pisces is a water sign and a mutable sign. For some this transit of Mars through Pisces can hurt, since, without the armor of our rational and ideological defenses, without the cold sword of our intellect, without the coordinates of our certainties, of our visions, what remains? What is our place of refuge?
This is the filtering, cleaning, detoxifying phase of Mars, submerged now in the primogenital waters of the Piscean temple of forgiveness, empathy and compassion. For some it may seem like a flood. Our body has its own life, we cannot fully control it. Are we drifting? Do we let ourselves be dissolved? Do we give up our defenses (arms)? Do we accept the process of redemption?
The greater our resistance to surrender ourselves, the more we will try to escape and avoid this call. Unchecked addictions, the need to keep ourselves happy through shots of artificial energy – sugar, films, social networks, superfluous conversations, consciousness-altering substances – whatever it may be, to avoid committing ourselves, to avoid feeling, to avoid embodying the changes of this profound movement.
During its journey through Pisces, Mars will meet Neptune – the 7th December – and Chiron – the 30th December -, two portals of initiation that speak to us of a filtering of our motivations. From what source(s) are we acting? Who moves us and with whom do we move? What hidden motivation lies behind our wishes and intentions? What truth do we want to avoid seeing, avoid integrating? From what are we fleeing? What self-deception conditions our will?
Mars now enters into a redemptive phase in which we become conscious of the cost of giving up our will to the power of the group mind. Perhaps we now feel like a solitary boat in the middle of the ocean, without the support of a tribe, without a network, without a collective. This solitude is sacred since it takes us to new ports, to new lands, in which we are called to weave other realities.
In the depth of our psyche, Mars is weaving and repairing old links to recodify the network that sustains our consciousness. We can call it faith, hope, confidence, commitment, unconditional love… it does not matter… that is where our warrior is – ancient mariner in the deep sea, oceanic uterine temple – unreachable, perhaps lost, who knows? We are rowing through the great mystery and our oars are our focus on the task at hand, the creative question like the force that motivates us to continue rowing onwards.
Mars will enter into Aries – its house, its sign – on the first of January 2019. This is the date that we want to mark down in our calendar. This is the date on which Mars is reintegrated as the guardian of fire, reincorporated, is ready to start again, to undertake, to act. Its sword, tempered by its initiations, opens a path for embodying another way of walking, acting, looking after, protecting. For now, Mars is out on the high seas and Mercury (which shared time in retrogradation with Mars in July) will be returning to the waters of Scorpio, whilst Venus retraces its path forwards through the degrees that it already covered in this sign. There is light at the end of the tunnel, yes, but for now we are still navigating through the deep sea of our psyche.
The veils continue to be stripped away and we recognize that we are ready to go beyond the surface. We have accepted the invitation to go into the depths. We have accepted death in order to be reborn. We have accepted the initiation. And now, the revelation of the full moon shows us that what until now we have called being reborn is simply the presence of the eternal, that which never dies, within us. That integral version of our being, which remembers how to navigate the alchemy of living with an opened, embodied heart.
Therefore, in this first full moon with Jupiter in Sagittarius, in conjunction with the sun, we honor and celebrate this light, this spark of our immortal truth. We need to trust, we need to construct the hope that through correcting our version of ourselves we will be able to create a less oppressive reality, less influenced by the trauma of our history.
And the paradox is that it is the acceptance of the drama of the trauma which liberates us. It is through embracing its invitation to enter into – to sweat, to cry, to make conscious water, to give body to the pain, to question and to listen – that we will feel with force the light of our eternal spirit.
* Michael Evans Healey :: Proof Reading, Editing and Translation :: (English/Spanish/French) :: firstname.lastname@example.org *